As you do each and every thing, make each and every action, I will judge you nonetheless. It is human nature to form opinions or impressions of people through the things that they do, it really is. And in this age of social media, where information is wide and free, and ever-so-transparent, we are more often than not, bothered and concerned with others’ opinions of us. We think that when we do certain things — of course, I don’t mean to say illegal and lawless ones — we are afraid of getting ‘stomped’ (in Singapore), or even scorned and become an object of ridicule just because we do something out of the norm. Rumours will run rampant, friends will snigger when you walk pass them. Maybe that’s how I feel, and that is why we don’t do certain things that make us, us.
It’s a weird thought actually. It crossed my mind when I was on a bus travelling back home. I’m sure you have seen people actually singing in the MRT, not giving a shit about what other people think. You know to a certain extent, I respect their lack of awareness to their surrounding. Although having said that, one should always remain socially responsible when you’re in the public because well, the public isn’t all yours — it’s a shared space.
But what exactly is socially responsible? Well, I have a few ideas: have a bath before you head out, thereby smelling nice when you’re in public; not showing your feet to other commuters when you’re in a public transport; not talk that loudly when you’re on the phone etc. I’m sure there’s a lot more you guys can come up with.
Say, why are we actually so concerned about everyone’s opinion of us? You know that Indian guy (an expat) who got stomped for singing so passionately in that moment? Well, I like to think that he was happy and was just expressing his happiness in that day. However, I guess that one person who stomped him wasn’t so happy about how happy he was that day. Was it his skin color? Or was it just because he was singing? Will it be different if an actual Singaporean was doing what he did? I don’t know but I like to think that he was just being him yet we couldn’t accept him for what he was doing. There are many cases of such, and precisely so, people nowadays rarely express themselves in this conservative society of ours.
Happiness is quite a simple yet puzzling thing. However, I know for a fact that, in order for people to actually be happy, to feel intrinsically happy and love the life they are living, they have to be themselves. In other words, we should like ourselves and be able to be ourselves. People feel unhappy when their feelings are suppressed, you get what I mean? The thing is we have to accept that whatever people think of us, they are not us and we’re not them. We can’t stop what they think, and what they think should not affect how we feel. Because our feelings are ours, we own them and we must be in control of them.
So I hereby implore you, to be yourself a little more every day, show kindness and express love to people around you. Compliment your friends in this conservative society that doesn’t seem to encourage such behaviours — it’s not like you’ll end up having sex because you compliment someone right? But do you find yourself complimenting people once in a while, be it stranger or not? I’m hearing a no. Be yourself regardless of what people feel about you. You are you, no one can change that.